“The greatest thing a father can do for his daughter, is love her mother.”

WORDS OF WISDOM

Let’s Focus on What Really Matter at Christmas Time
families, self care, parents Louise Shalders families, self care, parents Louise Shalders

Let’s Focus on What Really Matter at Christmas Time

What a challenging, confusing, sometimes frightening, tragic and certainly frustrating year 2020 became. Who would have thought this time last year that the year would have unfolded in such a way? There’s so much going on during the run up to Christmas that’s it’s easy to lose sight of what matters most. The festive season is, above all, a time for us all to rejoice with our loved ones.  A time to share the spirit of Christmas and embrace this magical time of year, and gives thanks for each other.

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6 Ideas to Help You and Your Child Find Calm During Anxious Moments
Louise Shalders Louise Shalders

6 Ideas to Help You and Your Child Find Calm During Anxious Moments

If you’re more anxious than ever right now, you’re definitely not alone. We are all coping with a lot right now – a surging global health crisis that is displayed before us on the News each night, isolation and restrictions on our activities, ongoing concern regarding the future of job security and finances, and loads of uncertainty about everything from childcare to playdates.

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Some Fun Activities to Share with the Kids During Restrictions
Louise Shalders Louise Shalders

Some Fun Activities to Share with the Kids During Restrictions

Well, haven’t times changed for us right now as we continue to navigate the ‘not so sure what the immediate future holds’ with our kids. It’s time to get a little creative … and that’s hard for those of us who are not particularly built that way!

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What’s Really Going On When Your Child  Won’t Listen?
Louise Shalders Louise Shalders

What’s Really Going On When Your Child  Won’t Listen?

One of the most common requests I get from parents is, "I've tried everything and my child still won't listen. What can I do?" There are several factors involved in a child's willingness to cooperate. A child not doing what she is told is less about "not listening" and more about how able she feels to do what you want her to do.

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Little Miss Back-Chat …
Louise Shalders Louise Shalders

Little Miss Back-Chat …

Talking back, sassy comments and rude gestures by children are a common complaint among parents and can cause problems within a family if the behaviour is not acknowledged. But what can parents do to stop this?

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Throwing, Hitting, Kicking, Pinching, Biting …
Louise Shalders Louise Shalders

Throwing, Hitting, Kicking, Pinching, Biting …

The prefrontal cortex of the developing brain, where reasoning, logic, and forethought take place, is highly immature in toddlers and pre-schoolers and actually doesn’t develop fully until the mid-twenties. 

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Imprinting…Unravelling an Over-Processed Approach to Parenting

Imprinting…Unravelling an Over-Processed Approach to Parenting

The lifelong journey of parenting is one of the most relentless and rewarding you are likely to ever experience. This is an exciting, exhausting period where life’s experiences can be enjoyed and at times dismayed over. At times it may feel like a large exercise in troubleshooting, frustration and experimentation.

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Self-care for Parents

Self-care for Parents

Becoming a parent is perhaps one of the most rewarding life experiences one can have. For many, it can also be one of the most challenging and at times, downright exhausting period of adult life. Being a parent does not necessarily begin from the time your little bundle of joy arrives into this world.

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Becoming a Parent … the bits we don’t talk about

Becoming a Parent … the bits we don’t talk about

The first few months after having a baby is a period of time like no other.

It is life stage that arrives after many months of growing a new life inside of you and constantly adjusting to all the biological and psychological changes that brings. The arrival of your baby is a powerful event, regardless of delivery style. Your infant must slowly unfurl into a world of bright lights, noise, pollution and new experiences and you must recover from a life-changing period of physical change and emotional upheaval.

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The Influence of Dads …

The Influence of Dads …

For decades researchers have studied the impact of father involvement on children’s developmental outcomes, the co-parenting relationship, and development of fathers themselves. Here is a plethora of results from a variety of researchers.

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5 Things Dads can do to Raise Emotionally Healthy Children

5 Things Dads can do to Raise Emotionally Healthy Children

Sometimes I have the opportunity to work with men on issues of fatherhood including the themes of communication, commitment, identity, intimacy and trust. The men I work with often have difficulties in their personal lives relating to the people they love most. They yearn for their children to be happy and successful, yet they often lack the skills and ability to model a way to help them accomplish this.

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Dads Love, Laugh, Listen and Learn…

Dads Love, Laugh, Listen and Learn…

"Almost any man can be a father, but it takes a special person to be a dad."

The quality of Love, Laughter, Listening and Learning within a family are the key factors in its happiness and success. These four values are the foundation of any happy, healthy family and society.

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In Pursuit of Happiness

In Pursuit of Happiness

There is a lot that’s said about happiness. Money can’t buy it, others can’t create it for you, stuff doesn’t lead to it, and neither does isolation. So we meditate, eat right, exercise, pray (or not), try our best to make real and lasting relationships, have stable jobs, and try to be nice to the ones we love. But how do we know if we are really getting there?

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How to Commit to anger Management in Parenting
Being Perfectly Imperfect Part 2

Being Perfectly Imperfect Part 2

There is absolutely nothing wrong with trying to improve oneself throughout one’s life…that motivation for self-improvement is one of the cornerstones of the human experience and can be something that gives us a great sense of purpose of our time on this earth. But when that drive becomes one of a constant need to be perfect, it takes a lot away from us.

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Take a Moment and Practice Unspoken Love

Take a Moment and Practice Unspoken Love

More often than not, family life feels very complicated. We often wonder if we are doing the right things to make our family members feel loved and supported, and whether or not we are spending our time in the right ways. As parents in particular, we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to create a beautiful home-life for our children. But this alone can make us forget the most basic ways of expressing unconditional love.

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14 Time- Saving Strategies for Busy Mums

14 Time- Saving Strategies for Busy Mums

1. Get Organised. It's amazing how many people spin their wheels each day looking for lost keys, phone numbers, the red shirt or a specific pair of shoes. Spend a weekend getting yourself organised.

2. Find Your Time-wasters. Keep track for one week of all the ways you waste time. Do you spend 10 minutes finding your keys? If so, make a key hook by your door, and use it. Do you forget "that one item" when you go to the store? Keep a list on your refrigerator and, each time you empty something, add it to the list.

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Are you really seeing your child?

Are you really seeing your child?

Have you ever stopped to consider the true emotional toll parenting takes on you? Not the obvious stuff like loss of sleep or the ever-present worry for your kids’ general well-being, but the constant, almost subconscious, mental scanning of your little one’s needs?

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Being Perfectly Imperfect

Being Perfectly Imperfect

Part 1

We are our own worst enemy. How many times have we heard this phrase?

In this modern age where everything seems to be functioning on crack and one error sometimes means the line between job security or dismissal. Or a difference of one grade marking the difference between securing an entry into the university and course of your choice or being relegated to something you will likely suffer through. It is no wonder that we, as a human species, have been nurtured to excel, to perform, to be extraordinarily meticulous to detail from a very young age for fear of falling short. In short, some of us have, over time, developed a rather interesting, and sometimes debilitating need, to be perfect.

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